I want to say SORRY I know I have said sorry many times in my life, but I never meant it as much as I do now, Im so sorry that I could not be my best and that you and my best friends had to handle me at my worst for a long period of time, Im so sorry that it seemed like I did not listen to your advices, but I did, to all of them, I remember every mistake I made, I know life did not help me out with certain things that were out of my hands, but I have to look inside myself and realize WHY? and I can clearly see the answer to that question. We all are gonna leave this world one day , some sooner than others, but thats not the point, the point its to truly see yourself in the mirror and see what u are doing wrong and change it, I dont wanna be anymore a bad, angry, anxious person, I just want peace of mind, this post is dedicated especially to one person , who I love so much, and means the world to me, that person wont see this, but Im truly sorry from my heart, I wish she could see how much she means to me and how much I tried, I will always own her so much , Im so ashamed of myself, of who I was, and maybe still am, I want to have a rebirth as Gaga says, I wanna be me without my demons, I just wanna be free! , losing my hair for me means NOTHING compared to losing my friends, and I want to ask God, the Universe and all of you forgiveness, my OCD and anxiety made me a very annoying person and I cant make others understand or force them to be my friends, I dont want to hurt anybody, but I did, I wish my words could be better so I could truly explain myself how much it burns me inside every person I have lost, every rejection that I felt, in the end it was all ME, and me alone, sometimes we want to find and excuse or blame somebody, but the only way to move on or restart your life or whats wrong with it its realizing that you can change for better, that u are the only one who can calm your inner storms, dont be afraid to say this words "IM SORRY", and thank you again Gaga for that magnificent iconic song that right now is the definition of my life. IM deeply sorry. Because its not about whos right or wrong, we are all humans and we all need and want one thing LOVE, I truly believe that we can improve if we really want to, remember that you will live with yourself for the rest of your life, this is not a competition, this is an experience that it happened to us, to be alive...lets try to make the best of it while it lasts