With the recent posts, and talks about image, I have been very aware of the fact that there is a lot of "ED" talk. People needing support, and other monsters reaching out for help. I want you all to read this post for yourself, or even for the benefit of others. Whilst this is a very complex illness I do not think for a moment that I am listing every single warning sign - far from. It is more than feeling less than beautiful , it is not a vanity disease. I just wanted to write this, and put myself out there to show you if ANYONE needs any support I am here. Long story short: For 19 years (I am 25), I had an eating disorder. It damaged my body in several ways, many of which are permanent, and it altered the way I think about food, weight, relationships and my own image. It wasn't planned or plotted out; in fact, for most of those years, I was truly positive I was in control. I'd have moments of clarity where I'd realize I was destroying myself and losing weight wasn't worth it, but those were few and far between. Now, though, I've worked for a long time on making my brain keep track of my thoughts so I can avoid getting so bad again. This has led me to be a lot more aware of warning signs in myself and with other people. It can happen before you realize it. With the dozens upon dozens of juice cleanses, intense gym memberships, weight loss smoothies, sugar-free/fat-free/taste-free snack brands and lemon and honey water diets, it can be incredibly difficult to keeping a balance of feeling good (both mentally and physically). Distinguishing between healthy progress and simply "progress" is often difficult; when you first lose weight, it seems like people want to tell you all the time, after all. Your clothes are looser, you get to buy new ones and you feel wonderful because you've been told since you were a child that skinnier = prettier and being pretty = of the utmost importance to your value as a human being. But it's not. And even if you cannot help but believe that your value is based on appearance — I still have trouble not placing value on my own, I admit — it's significant to recognize that many of the side effects of over-dieting and eating disorders can cause health problems that affect your appearance in addition to your insides. Here are a few questions to ask yourself: Are you a perfectionist when it comes to your appearance? Do you get angry with yourself when you "slip up" and eat something unhealthy? Do you classify all foods in categories of either good or bad? Would your day get worse if you weigh more today than yesterday? Do you think your life would get better if you lost weight? Have you ever thrown up, used laxatives, exercised excessively or otherwise purged when you've eaten unhealthily? Do you feel guilty when you eat? Do your eating habits make you tired, depressed or weak? If you answered "yes" to any of those, just reflect for a few minutes on why. I know this article won't help everyone who reads it and I know that eating disorders aren't well within most people's control (that's why they're called "disorders"), but if any of this rings true with you and you feel like you might want to explore more on this topic with somebody who just knows about it, feel free to let me know. If you want recommendations of places to go for professional help, I can find those out for you, too! Sometimes we all need a little bit, or a lot, of real assistance with our problems, and that's okay and often necessary to recover Only 1 out of 10 people with eating disorders receives treatment despite it being the 3rd most common chronic illness among adolescents. But if you start realizing you might need help, I can tell you that it's often easier to change your ways the faster you recognize that they're harmful. Either way, the most important thing is to talk about it. Even if it's just to yourself (if you're like me and fairly crazy, this won't be too abnormal), getting your feelings out there is incredibly important to recovery. I write about eating disorders and body image quite a bit because I think about those topics all the time, and pretending I don't would be like lying about what's important to me. No matter what makeup you wear or hair style you do or clothes you put on, it's so important to treat your body right. Looking good will never be worth feeling terrible, I promise. Take care lil monsters.